At my heaviest I was 315lbs. I got down to 270 lbs before surgery, I was huge and unhappy. After my surgery the weight started co.ING off but I still couldn't help but think "I am fat" I have went from a size 26 to a size 12 and from a 3to4x shirt to a LARGE yet o still see myself as too big. I look in the mirror and I see the difference or looking at pictures I see it but I can't make myself believe what I see. How does one deal with the mental part of this? I was doing ok until I started planning my upcoming wedding and now it's like all I see is fat and what needs improved. My family don't understand and I do t really have anyone to talk to so I am turning here. I need someone to talk to , I feel as if I am going g through this mental game all alone. Please any advise is appreciated.
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- Thread starter Jenn 1983
- Start date
I don't have advice for you but I know how you feel. Sometimes it feels like its just not enough. You may look into talking to a professional to figure out the underlying issue behind why you feel that way. I believe I'm this way because I was the youngest of 4 girls and I always felt like not good enough. It wasn't because my family expected too much, it's because I always felt they didn't care. Its tough and I've only just realized this. It has put a strain on my relationship with my family. But, I have now started to vocalize with them that I expect their support (not about surgery... they do not know...) if they want to be part of my life. They are slowly coming around and I hope by this time next year, the relationships will be mended. We'll see. But, in the meantime I will continue to work on myself mentally as the weight comes off. I did boxing for 4 years and that made me the most confident ever! Plus it's great stress relief. If you have a Title Boxing Club in your area, I HIGHLY suggest going and taking a free class. It's hard as hell, but your endurance will build up and you will feel like a bad@$$! The gym is my safe place now and I can not wait to get permission to get back in there.
Tracy Lindenmuth
Member
Ugh, I wish I knew what to say, a size 12 is amazing you have come so far, stop looking in the mirror, and live your life, I know it is easier said than done, but I know you can do it. Put up some old pics of your self around the house to remind yourself of where you have been and appreciate where you are now. Keep your chin up, learn to love the new you!!! The more you love yourself is the more you will love your soon to be husband good luck and congratulations on your upcoming wedding
Carolyn270
Member
You most definitely don't have to go it alone. We are here. We may not fully experience the same self doubts and unwanted thoughts but those are out there wrecking havoc on our self esteem. Do you have personal idea of the size you think is not fat? Not societies idea but yours alone. I hope and pray I am not coming off harsh or negative in any way. I just feel like maybe we get these unhappy thoughts cause we are used to how easy it is to feel negative versus positive. I'm not a professional anything but people always say love yourself for who you are. Do you feel that to be true? I think maybe it could be mino over matter as well. Tell yourself- brainwash if necessary- that you are beautiful always have been ans always will be no matter your size. It might pick up your self esteem from being treaded on. I think you will be fabulous in the wedding dress you pick. Congratulations on that!