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Woo hoo!! 4 days to go

I certainly have gone through this already. I'm 3 1/2 years post op. So. Friendly advice? Take each day as it comes, stay out of your head and give yourself the time and grace you need to heal.

Since your name is princess baby, I'm going to make the assumption that you are a woman. Women are taught to put others first almost from our first breath. I cannot overstate how important it is to make yourself your first priority during this journey.

So treat yourself like you would your children, pets, spouse, friends. Give 100% to yourself and this journey. It is truly transformative.
 
Best wishes to both expectant surgery friends on this thread! Keep us posted on here and we will help in any way we can. It is normal to be excited and anxious, but you are worth it! You are putting yourself first right now and your health will thank you! Find a trusted friend who will be encouraging in the difficult times. It helps to get it from someone face to face also especially if they have been down this road already. Ask them to help you. I have three and they are overjoyed to help even about the sensitive stuff and it has been a blessing.

A quick word of advice, take home everything they want to give you from your hospital stay. MIne gave me a lot of protein shakes, a huge sleeve of medicine cups (2.5 oz paper cups), and other various supplies for my going home day. If they offer, why not?
 
FinallyMe said:
Find a trusted friend who will be encouraging in the difficult times. It helps to get it from someone face to face also especially if they have been down this road already. Ask them to help you. .
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I want to add the other side of the coin to reactions (vs. "responses" to surgery). There may be people in your family or circle who, for whatever reason, get suddenly very negative about you and all your decisions. I encountered nasty comments among the people I DIDN'T tell. But I knew they would be even more negative if I told them what I was planning. In my case, most of the negatives were from people who were jealous. Then there's this type that a few of us know, which is DON'T CHANGE: YOU'LL MAKE ME LOOK BAD. There is a tacit agreement in my family that we all eat the most fattening food and try to outdo each other at potlucks and celebrations.

I think it's important to have prepared responses for these comments. It was especially important for me because I have a huge family (10 people, including parents) and I had a couple of vicious sisters who I KNEW would be jealous, but they'd figure out a way to insult me without it seeming like they were.

I figured out a way to make it sound like they'd given me a compliment. I'd say, "Thank you for noticing my weight loss. You know how I've struggled with it over the years and I really appreciate your support." They didn't even know they were supporting me but as soon as they heard that, they'd find a way to make a supportive comment.

Have other people been insulted after WLS?
 
I remember a coworker had had WLS before I did and while sitting at lunch someone commented "I think I'd just work out rather than have my stomach removed." The coworker burst into tears and left. I said " judging by the size of ASS you ARE, you'd better start exercising now!!"

When I had my surgery a different coworker was like " but isn't all that loose skin going to be gross?" I said, "It won't look any different if I lose this stomach or you lose that one .. Skin sags after weight loss."

My advice is practice not only nice comments. I respond to rudeness with rudeness. I leave the turning of the other cheek to the bible lol
 
I think this forum is very special because we all have a range of experiences and personalities and it is nice to hear authentic conversation about these in a safe space. I realize the support from some of my friends who had WLS before me may be rare but i have a complicated relationship with my parents and their fight with obesity due to eating habits which I was raised on. I used to worry about my mom eating so few calories, without WLS, but she snacked and didn't admit it so still wasn't losing weight, and wondered why, but you couldn't tell her because she wouldn't listen, she didn't want the truth. I am inspiring her now to really lose weight (she likes racing me). My Dad has eating disorders and a lot of pride but inteligent enough to know what he is doing, and we can't figure out why he doesn't try harder to be healthy. It is a healthy loving relationship, but complicated because we all really want the others to be healthy and succeed, and love one another, but want to do it our own ways without being told by the others. I think it is just too emotional. We definitely support one anothers successes, we just don't want anyone giving their two cents on our chosen path.
 
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