Hi everyone. I had gastric bypass 2 years ago and have gone from 299lbs to 178lbs. I am able to see that I am smaller than before but I have become more and more obsessed with my weight and the fact that my BMI of 30 is still obese and can’t help to feel like I failed this surgery. Prior to my weight loss, I dreamed of being under 200lbs but now that I am here I can’t help but be so disappointed of how big I still am. Anyone else suffering from this?
More weight obsessed after weight loss
WazzuCoug
Member
You have had incredible success! Don't sell yourself short. Losing 121 lbs is awesome and your body is probably very grateful. I'm sure many people go through ups and downs, and it sounds like you are in a "down" phase. I can't predict how I'll feel at the two year mark, but I have faith that you can continue to make progress with good choices and healthy habits. However, even if you don't lose another pound, you have done amazing things for yourself!
I hate to be a broken record on this forum, but BMI is complete BS, throw it away and never look at it again. It is a completely useless tool that insurance companies use to screw people out of decent health and life insurance coverage and has absolutely ZERO basis in medical facts. It was contrived in the 1800 by a mathematician with absolutely no medical experience and wasn't even intended for how it is used today. Look to other methods of health indicators like relative fat mass or body fat %.
If I were try to reach my "ideal" BMI, I would be 30 lbs under the weight I was when I was 20 years old in the US Marine Corps with a body fat around 10%. It just isn't reality, and you shouldn't compare yourself to it.
Focus on good habits, keep the faith and keep going forward!
I hate to be a broken record on this forum, but BMI is complete BS, throw it away and never look at it again. It is a completely useless tool that insurance companies use to screw people out of decent health and life insurance coverage and has absolutely ZERO basis in medical facts. It was contrived in the 1800 by a mathematician with absolutely no medical experience and wasn't even intended for how it is used today. Look to other methods of health indicators like relative fat mass or body fat %.
If I were try to reach my "ideal" BMI, I would be 30 lbs under the weight I was when I was 20 years old in the US Marine Corps with a body fat around 10%. It just isn't reality, and you shouldn't compare yourself to it.
Focus on good habits, keep the faith and keep going forward!
3momchaos
Member
What are other ways you can see your success? How’s your blood work compared to pre op? How about clothing size? Energy level? I’m 5’10, and pre op at my heaviest was 297, and have a large body frame. People kept telling me that I wasn’t that overweight because I carried my weight different, but they didn’t know how much I actually weighed or what that was doing to my body. Now I am 197, and I know I will continue to lose since I’m only 6 months out, but if I were to be under 25 BMI, I would look sickly. Even my surgeons office doesn’t care if I’m in healthy weight range according to the BMI chart because more important things are within range now. My A1C is 4.9, my cholesterol is great, my blood pressure is back within normal range, most of my vitamins are good, and my liver tests are normal for the first time in I don’t know how long. Maybe the best thing you can do for yourself to see your success is to step away from the scale for a while to see how you feel about you, not a number.
JudyNY
Member
I echo what Ryan and 3mom says. I think it is important to give ourselves credit for how far we have come. No one promised perfection but they did lead us to believe we will be much better off than before. Sounds like you have a lot to be grateful for. Try not to focus on the scale or what your BMI is. I'm sure you are so much healthier than you were before and be extra proud that you haven't regained! Welcome to the group!
missyinacage
Member
I totally understand feeling down occasionally but I hope you know that you've done a great job. You literally lost over 40% of your entire body weight. That is so impressive. If you kept a pair of jeans or something, I'd suggest trying them on when you get down about your weight. That might help put things back into perspective for you. Once you're in the maintenance zone, it's easier to forget where you were and see only where you are now. Which is, of course, never that ideal that you were hoping for. Even people with an ideal BMI often have body image issues. Try to keep your expectations realistic.
Thanks everyone for your kind words and suggestions. I am very grateful to have come so far so I don’t want to seem like I am whining. I’ve fallen into the trap of looking at before and after pictures of people on “Instagram” or blogs who look amazing and I can’t help to feel like a failure. Thankfully, I decided to have surgery younger (when I was 26) so I did not have health issues that Had to be reversed. Granted, fitting into a size 10 from a 22 has felt good but just expected for it all to feel better. The best way to describe it is that prior to surgery I was so far from any “normal weight” that it was like a football game I was losing 0-42. Now, I am so much closer yet far away. Now I feel like it is 14-14 and I just missed the field goal. The worst part is that these feelings consume my mind 24/7 and my friends really encouraged me to reach out to different online communities to share my struggles to see if it helps lol. Who knows
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missyinacage
Member
Did you see the Khloe Kardashian drama regarding an unedited photo of her? (yes, there is a point to this) Ignoring all the other things she has going for her (the money, the fame etc) she is a healthy weight. She is also a human being and has given birth. And yet, because the photo was not edited and you could see that her stomach was not concave and the skin on her thighs was not perfectly smooth, the family threatened legal action if the photos were not taken down by the posting party and Khloe herself is spending extra hours in the gym. Because body image is skewed and has gotten worse since the invention of Photoshop. Please remind yourself of that when the negative thoughts take over. They're just thoughts. Take a step back and examine them for truth before you spiral into the idea that you are a failure. If you were a failure, you'd weigh (at least) 299 again. Success does not require perfection, only improvement.
dianeseattle
Member
JudyNY
Member
Unfortunately for many of us, that is so true. It can lead to careless eating or junk food eating because you can get the mentality of what difference does it make. Unfortunately many years of that way of thinking can do some big damage. If only we appreciate ourselves a little more and not be so hard on ourselves. I'm going to start a new thread that I've been meaning to do for a while. It will be called Daily Inspiration and I will try to post something every day. I've got a little pocket journal that I've been saving quotes in. I find it a helpful way to start my day.