The pre op period can be confusing and difficult time. It can come with a lot of doubts about success in the future, especially because it's hard to imagine a change in our relationship with food after surgery. For myself, I failed at so many diets, I often wondered as I proceeded toward the surgery how things would be different after surgery if I didn't think I could really change what I eat. I drank about a liter of diet Coke a day and was so tied up in that, I'd even question if the surgery was worth it because I couldn't drink Diet Coke again. That led me to wonder if I could stop eating fast food, or pasta or meals with tons of cheese, etc. etc.
I imagine many people go through similar thoughts like: Can I really change? Do I want to change? Can I or do I want to give up some of the things I like/love to eat? I certainly had thoughts like that.
I don't know if you are dealing with any comorbidities, but I had a litany of issues prior to surgery. I knew those comorbidities were going to be much harder to get rid of without the surgery. I knew that my history of dieting meant that with every new diet, it gets more and more difficult to lose weight until it is practically impossible. There are so many factors at play, and after a certain point our bodies are do protective of our obesity that it is very rare for an individual to lose what they need to lose and keep it off for any length of time.
Even with all the doubts, I went forward with the surgery. I'm not a long term success story, yet. I'm still early in my journey at not quite 5 months post op, but what an amazing 5 months it has been!
The surgery doesn't just restrict the amount of food you can eat, it also affects your hormones and microbiome in positive ways. Although the hormonal and microbiome changes are somewhat temporary, they do give you a nice 12 month window to build a new relationship with food. For many during this time, their taste in food changes. Although I was drinking a liter of Diet Coke a day, I don't drink any now and I don't miss it. I used to eat a ton of bread, but I don't now and I don't miss it. I used to eat a ton of pasta. I don't know and I don't miss it.
Everyone is different, but after surgery, as you are going through the different phases, you have a real opportunity to reset how you eat. The way you view food may be completely different, and it is something that is very, VERY difficult to wrap your mind around before you have the surgery because it is hard to imagine not being attracted to the same foods after surgery as you are now, but for more people, there is a definitive change.
That doesn't mean it is an easy change. Your brain can still want foods that aren't great for you at times, and there are still battles with stress, emotion, and other things like that, which could lead to making poor food choices. However, having the surgery gives you multiple new weapons to fight the obesity battle, and the success rate is very high, both in the short term and the long term.
All that being said, you really have to want to go through with it and really want the change. If you want to put it off and try to lose the weight on your own again, there is always the possibility that you might find the diet key that works for you. If you do find that key, and you are successful without surgery, you'll be among the very, very few success stories, and that would be amazing! There is nothing wrong with trying to avoid the surgery and losing weight without it.
On the other hand, there is nothing wrong with getting the surgery and moving forward with a proven method of weight loss either. I still eat lots of foods that I love and enjoy. There are some things I exclude, and there are some things I just have occasionally, but my entire focus during this first year was finding the diet that works right for me that I can sustain for the rest of my life, and I feel that I've found the right thing for me. I think that is pretty much every person's success story on this journey. They get the benefits of the surgery and lose a lot of weight in that first year, and during that time they rediscover the benefits of being a more normal weight and making different good choices, and they decide to stick with that. This translates into long term success and quality of life.
Your choice is your choice. Neither direction you decide to go is a bad choice if you are committed to making some sort of change. You've made some changes already. Maybe that is enough for you and you'll continue to lose weight slowly and regain better health. Maybe you'll experience more dramatic change, more quickly with surgery. Either way, sticking with a decision to be healthier is a key to success.
Surgery is a big deal, so definitely weigh the options, spend a lot of time with honest self-reflection, and only move forward with surgery if/when you are ready and feel like you are mentally prepared for the change, if you feel it would be best for you.
