N00b post

[Ophelie]

I started the process to get a gastric sleeve about two years ago but backed out for different reasons, mostly fear and addiction issues. I'm motivated to try again. I need to lose over a hundred pounds. I wasn't committed to the surgery before because I wasn't able to stick to quitting smoking or my other addictive vice: Mountain Dew. And I knew that they wouldn't allow me to go through the surgery and it wouldn't be successful even if they did without me getting help for my issues first. I quit smoking a month ago. So far, so good. I'm taking baby steps. My next goal is quitting Mountain Dew and all carbonated drinks. I have CPTSD and depression and an addictive brain. I wasn't being well cared for by my mental health providers. They were throwing psych meds at me for the wrong diagnoses and I just kept getting worse and worse until I wasn't functioning at all. My house was squalor, I am too fat to move without pain and my hygiene was not what it should be... and I was just basically waiting to die. I wouldn't even leave the house. Diet and exercise were out of the question at that point. December I stopped taking all psych meds and started feeling better for the first time in 15 years. I got into DBT groups and trauma talk therapy at the beginning of May of this year and everything is starting to improve... My youngest sonl who just turned 19, begged me to turn my health around because he was frightened that he'd be alone in the world as every other relative he has is dead, dying, or very ill and not taking care of themselves. I got help. I'm doing SMART Recovery now because 12 steps are too religious for me. It may take me a few more weeks before I attempt to quit soda. I quit smoking cold turkey and I'm still suffering from cravings. I won't attempt to quit soda until I'm confident I can resist smoking easily... It's just too hard to be withdrawing psychologically/physically from more than one substance at a time. I'm looking for some easy exercises that I can start to do daily because even just walking to the mailbox and back is too much for me. My lower back starts to scream and I can't breathe. I recently bought a yoga mat, waiting for it to show up. I'm hoping to find some youtube videos of easy yoga routines for beginners that won't be painful... I have to start slow. Any recommendations?

 

[3momchaos]

Welcome! Sounds like you have a solid grasp on your abilities and do not want to stress your body and brain too much, which is awesome. When people just try and stop everything at once it rarely works. Even preparing for the surgery I have not committed to everything at once. Baby steps is the name of the game for me! I have chronic lower back, hip, and knee pain. I did a YouTube search for modified yoga and found some good exercises. Also, as lame as it can sound, DDP yoga has been good. I modify it to my physical limitations though. I hope this helps a little. Happy you’re here!

 

[Tokash]

I would suggest starting to work with a dietician now and not wait. While you might be a ways out until you can have surgery the dietician can help you start changing eating habits and building new routines to start the weight loss process. I didnt realize until I started just how much my nutrion was off and what I was and wasn't getting. They can also help offer suggestions and support to kick the pop.

 

[Ophelie]

I am going to call my doctor to ask for a referral today.... as soon as I finish typing this reply. Thanks, all! I'm happy that people actually reply here. Over on the SMART Recovery forum, I feel like I'm shouting down into a well. I think it would definitely behoove me to start seeing a nutritionist now... I have seen one before, the last time I tried to get a gastric sleeve... and she was alright, but it was very difficult to feel comfortable around her for me for some reason. Does anyone know a good support group specifically for food/soda addiction? I don't have a severe eating disorder per se... apart from being addicted to crappy food. I don't often binge/purge or starve myself. I don't count calories or obsess in that way, currently... but I still just can't walk away from eating crap and drinking soda. I hate the taste of anything that is touted as healthy or low cal. I eat like a toddler. I have a hard time forcing myself to drink water or put anything healthy in my body. It's a bizarre kind of self harm, I think. I have a feeling that if I can just start with quitting the soda, I would drop a lot of weight without trying... because the amount of soda I drink every single day is rather obscene and it's tearing up my insides, from my mouth and my teeth to my GI tract... It's as bad as any serious drug problem, from my perspective... drinking at least 2 liters or a 12 pack every single day, 365 days a year... no bueno! i already have a genetic kidney disease that makes me a stone quarry and have chronic UTI infections... and I am stage three renal failure. Two more stages and I will be dead. being a severe soda addict on top of that... is suicidal, to be honest. and i need help to quit. and people tend to laugh at me when i try to find specific help with soda addiction... because it's so very accepted here in America as a drink and innocent household substance. but it's as bad as meth, from my perspective... and i can't even get arrested for it and insurance won't cover rehab for it... even if there was a rehab for it in america... (there is not).