I agree with your family. That's only four weeks and you're not going to do yourself any favors by taking a long drive (I assume it's long--you don't say). You could decide on a Christmas visit instead of Thanksgiving. It's a tradeoff between gorging yourself at a feast or stuffing dozens of cookies and candies down your craw.
But neither of these things need to happen. I begged off family holiday meals for the first year, but went on the second. I was sitting at a table with my cousins and a new in-law who had had the surgery before me. She'd told everyone, but I told no one. She was barraged with questions and interfered with in general. In the meantime, I'd take a tablespoon of yams and smear them around until they covered 1/4 of the plate. Did the same with small portions of cranberries, turkey, gravy and mashed. It was literally less than a cup of food but afterward, I pretended to be stuffed and turned down the pies.
I saved myself a lot of explaining and listening to dozens of uninformed opinions.
Anytime a feast occurs post-op, you have an opportunity to re-create into a healthy meal, just with different foods.
