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YMMV

dianeseattle

dianeseattle

Member
I wanted to mention that I've noticed something lately in this group. The content seems to more closely resemble a diet group, like weight watchers, than a support group for people recovering from bariatric surgery.

I may be wrong, but that's been my impression.
 
I must not be hip enough; what is YMMV? I'm having fun coming up with what the letters could stand for, but I'll betcha I'm not even close.Lol

I don't really know what weight watchers groups do, other than encouraging members on their weight loss journeys. I guess that's part of what this group does, plus advising those who are considering surgery or who have concerns or victories to share.

Do you have any suggestions for what we should focus more on? You've played such a vital role in helping this place grow and thrive, and I learn so much from your posts. Thanks Diane ❤❤❤❤
 
Your Mileage May Vary. It's just an internet-cutesy way to say it's one of many opinions.

It might be easiest to compare tips--diet v. surgery--and shared experience to understand what I mean. I worry that people who come here pre- and post-op seeking support are not directly assisted, but instead, given recipes.

I'm not opposed to recipes. We have a forum dedicated to them. But I do follow newbies' posting history and there are a lot who only post once or twice, perhaps because their issues weren't addressed, and then disappear.

We are in the unique position of being experts about one thing--bariatric surgery. We can help others seeking real information about that, on a case by case basis.

The bottom line for me is common ground, not what to eat. In WW, people are given diets. They usually lose weight and gain it back.

We choose surgical revision and protein-focused pointers. That simple structure makes all the difference.

By the way, I'm not referring to any particular person here. I am guilty of this very thing. I felt the dialogue was skewing to diet talk, not surgical & revision surgeries.

Hope that makes sense. I'm kind of off these days, as life complications are affecting me.
 
Diets are temporary in most peoples minds. Once ‘I” get to where I want to be (the goal weight) then “I” can go back to old eating habits…….one of my best friends has been doing the shake replacements for meals and has been fluctuating up and down for the last year. I keep telling her she needs to commit not for goal but for everyday for the rest of her life.

As bariatric patients we are learning how to cook for bariatric needs such as proteins, low carbs, low/no sugar, natural fiber. Most of us (at least I was) were told this eating should not change. It is a lifetime commitment to go with the changes the surgery does to our body. This is why the bariatric dr/team want annual visits to make sure we do stay on track.

I personally have not done much with recipes here I really don’t cook much. And I prefer breakfast foods all day if I could get away with it. Cereal in the morning. P3 snack packs have become a staple for lunch. And protein pancakes or waffles for dinner sometimes with bacon or sausage. For snacks I do pure protein bars. At Aldi I have found decaf ice tea with lemon sweetened but not overly sweet, I saved my 16 ounce protein water bottles and fill them to keep track of my fluid intake. This is my solution for me it is not fit for everyone.
 
dianeseattle said:
I wanted to mention that I've noticed something lately in this group. The content seems to more closely resemble a diet group, like weight watchers, than a support group for people recovering from bariatric surgery.

I may be wrong, but that's been my impression.
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Our diet is such a major part of our recovery from bariatric surgery, I think it's only natural for that to be a dominant part of our discussions. When I use the term diet, I refer to the way we eat in general not a particular diet.

Our diet/nutrition program, especially in the early stages is challenging and often it is where the most support is needed. Protein goals can seem completely overwhelming to newbies. Sharing recipes and ideas is a good thing in my opinion.
 
I don't disagree. I'm only pointing out that I think we, as a group, are discussing intermediate topics in an unbalanced way, and they are not helpful to newbies who are seeking answers desperately that are more elementary and introductory. I feel we are a little out of balance, even though our topics are relevant to the entire journey after surgery. I'd hope members would put recipes aside and intensely discuss questions our newcomers need answers to. That's the purpose of a support group.
 
I can see what you're saying but at the end of the day, WLS is a tool .. food and our relationship with it is where the real change happens. I, personally, ate a very unhealthy diet pre-surgery, that involved mostly highly processed, refined carbs and high fat meals. It's important that we all learn how to eat a healthful diet and maintain the changes our tool gives us. I have noticed that a few members pretty much only post recipes. But, if that is all he/she feels they have to offer, well, I don't read recipes that I don't want to cook. But food advice is always welcome for me.

As for the newbie issue; we're not all newbies. It's just as important to get and give support to those of us that are 6, 18, or 36 months out. I'll be honest, I don't feel that I've mastered this post op life, as I know you have. I am here to get support, even now, as well as give it to others. When the newer people, post, I always try to welcome them and answer any questions, as so many did for me. But that does not negate the needs of those of us who are further out for support. Just because we know what we are supposed to be doing for long term success does not mean it comes easily. And quite honestly, the newer folks deserve a well balanced look at the long term struggles as well as the triumphs. I am not an expert on bariatric surgery; my surgeon is. I am only a traveler on this road, like everyone else. And my struggle continues to be food; what to eat, when to eat, how much to eat.

My favorite part of this group is that we can and do, discuss anything. We share not only bariatric surgery facts, but we open up and share our lives. And sadly, I've seen lots of newbies come, ask their 3 questions, and leave. Not everyone is looking to be involved in a support group. Many are just looking for a quick answer. Being involved in this support group requires time and commitment, just as if you joined an in person group. Not everyone has the time or wants to make that commitment. And that's okay, too.
 
Missy pretty well summed up how I feel about the subject of this thread. I've be thinking on how to answer Diane's concern but I struggled to come up putting it into words and what Missy said could have come right out of my mouth.

I feel bad if anyone thinks this is unbalanced but I do feel it is all relevant but just maybe at different stages of the process. I hope that all newbies will speak up with their questions and/or concerns and feel they are addressed in a helpful manner. Sometimes I don't answer the posts that bring up post surgery issues because my post-surgery was so different than anyone else here. Much of which I don't remember because I was literally out of it at the time with two life threatening crisis. A lot of my post surgery eating was dictated by what the hospital gave me which was not ideal but what I had to go by.

Anyway, I struggle day to day over a year out still trying to get to goal. I don't think I am the only one and I think this is all part of what this support group should be, albeit at different stages of our journeys. Just my 2 cents, for what it's worth!
 
You both said much more clearly what I was attempting to say!

One of the things I love most about this group is that it is truly a support group. Life happens before and after bariatric surgery. Coping with life situations might change depending on where you are in your WLS journey and how people in your life are reacting to it. Some of us, may rely on online support more than others. Just knowing someone is here, who cares, can get a struggling person through the day.
 
I appreciate your considered opinions so very much. I'm a little shocked that anyone would think I have any mastery of post-op life. I struggle every day, all day, with the eating disorder I've had all my life. If not for RYGB surgery I'd look like one of those Thanksgiving balloons in the Macy's parade. I've benefited from the generous support of this group and I don't think I've been as clear as I should be about how much I love you guys and how important you are to me. I check this group before I even look at my email.

It's therapeutic for me to see all the angles presented here. It's important to read and share. That's why this group is so valuable.
 
We appreciate you so much Diane. You are our success story after all these years keeping that weight off. We may not know of your daily struggles, but from our view we look up to you as being very successful in your journey. We appreciate all your knowledge, advice, friendship and support. :)
 
dianeseattle said:
I'm a little shocked that anyone would think I have any mastery of post-op life. I struggle every day, all day, with the eating disorder I've had all my life.
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Diane, you have been very honest about your struggles and generous in sharing them. And 14 years of success, ma'am, prove you have mastered it, so give yourself some well-deserved credit. That being said; I did not mean that you don't still struggle .. I am learning these food issues are going to be a life long battle.

It can look like it's easy from the outside, especially when you're keeping the weight off. And I don't want you to think I don't see you or know the work you put in. I know .. I have family that think it's just "easier" for me due to having the bypass (which they imagine causes dumping every time I take a bite of sugar/fat etc), more time to meal prep or that I just like healthier foods. As if surgery made me hate ice cream lol So I know you make the choice, Every. Single. Day. And sincerely apologize if I made you feel like I think you don't.
 
I'm good with whatever y'all want to discuss. If we help educate "newbies," we are providing necessary support as it's needed. After all, most of us have something to offer those just beginning or trying to find help along the way.

If we stray into socializing, that works for me too. I love it when we share parts of our lives with each other.

I'm just happy to belong to such an awesome, caring, supportive group, and I cherish the friendships I have found along the way. I truly love and am so grateful for y'all. ❤❤❤❤
 
I love this group. It's the only support group I participate in. I joined in August 2015. I was the only person here. A few days later, MamaBearof4 showed up. She was pre-op and I was seven years post-op.

During the days I was here alone, I read through the most recent posts, of people who had left the group. There wasn't anything that pointed to the mass exodus except boredom with the topic of surgery and more-social-like interaction most members didn't seem interested in.

I cant say that definitively, but I can say I've been so impressed by and grateful for what has become the core of our group. When a newcomer arrives, this core immediately welcomes her/him.

I'm not evaluating our group as somehow deficient. My comment was that I personally felt the focus was on recipes these days, which is absolutely okay and allowed. BTW, there are posting guidelines in our administrative section.

I've posted a lot of recipes. We have a recipes forum. I uploaded a file to our resource section full of recipe ideas. That way, I don't have to repeat myself.

I think my overarching concern was that a newcomer might find us rather advanced, whereas they need basic orientation.

But my opinion is just that: opinion. I only meant to express it, not to steer the group focus. If you see what I see or you don't see it, great. That's typically the dynamic of any support group.

And let me say again, this is the most wonderful group I've ever been part of. Keep posting and sharing, and agreeing or disagreeing. That dynamic is the heart of any working relationship.

Thanks for your kind comments about me, as well. I haven't publicized the crises I'm going through lately, but just being here with loving people has done more good for me than therapy.

And I made a great quiche yesterday!!!
 
For some reason, I have a talent for making pie crust. No brag, just fact. I think the secret is in minimal handling. So making pies is easy, and I just use what I have on hand for filling.

In this quiche I sauteed mushrooms, then tossed in a green pepper, a red onion, a pack of deli turkey, sliced into bits and made a filling of about a cup of milk +5 eggs. I had a big brick of cheddar that I needed to use--yuck. I usually use swiss or Gruyere.

I have a trick that makes pie better. I put the formed crust in a 375F oven for 10 minutes, after pricking the bottom and sides with a fork. This puts a baked layer on it that keeps it from getting soggy. This works really well for fruit pies, as well.

I don't really have a recipe. It's got to be a custardy mix so yesterday I used 5 eggs and about 12 oz of milk. I beat with a mixer. Then I laid down a small amount of cheese, all the cheese and fillings and poured the milk/cheese over it all.

Before I bake it I shake Johnny's seasoning salt over the top. I don't add any salt except that layer. It seems to harden up the top and it's pretty.

It's so easy to make and if you have veggies about to spoil, this is a great way to use them.

Bake at 375 for 45 minutes, then at 300 for about 30, until it springs back.

Often I'll buy premium ingredients and make a really delicious quiche. But I still need to drop my COVID-10lbs so I went easy on fatty stuff. The best thing about quiche is you can eat it for any meal. And each one I bake yields 8 thin slices that accompany a great green salad with balsamic vinegar.

Oops, did I just post a recipe in General Chat?
 
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