Can't please anyone......

[jduffy]

Hi, Everyone.
Went to Bariatrics Seminar at Cleveland Clinic on Thursday. I felt tired and well informed when I got home.
Yesterday I sat and read the book they gave us on the entire staff, the various surgeries, the five phases of food. and other things. After I read the book I called my nurse that comes to my home once a week and she was very, very negative about the surgery. Even talked about dropping me as a client. All she kept saying was, "Are you SURE this is what you want to do?". No happiness for me on losing weight.
Today I talked to an older female friend of mine who is so PRO-surgery that she can only tell me how wonderful it is and how no one that she knows who has had one moments trouble with or since surgery. She even put down this support group because it's not run by Cleveland Clinic.
Cleveland Clinic has a support group the second Tuesday of every month from 5:30 to 7. My problem is I don't have transportation to go. Plus I feel very comfortable with everyone I've met here so far.
Yes, I'm afraid of surgery but who isn't? I'm also hopeful of a new life after surgery. I know it's going to be hard but good things usually are hard to do.
I feel safer talking here than I do to anyone else in my world.
Oh, yes, Cleveland Clinic Bariatric and Metabolic Institute's doctors and center were awarded the Bariatric Surgery Center of Excellence and are part of the Bariatric Surgery Center Network. All surgeons have done 150+ bariatric surgeries to be hired by the clinic and do 100+ bariatric surgeries a year.
Please help me.

 

[Kim M]

Depending on how many people you share this with, you can get many different reactions. If this is something you really want to do, tell people who you think will support you. If your not sure of what they say and how this will impact your decision, than don't tell. I would have expected a different reaction from your nurse. I think she would have taken a more professional response even if she didn't think it was a good choice. I have heard great things about the Cleveland Clinic. I was not able to attend the support group from my hospital either due to work conflict. I have always used online support groups and have gotten tremendous support. Do your research and ask many questions. Read posts. This is how you will learn. Wishing you all the best in what ever decision you choose.

 

[Cheyenne]

I thought seriously about bariatric surgery for the last 10 yrs. I was very afraid. I have an autistic grandson who lives with me and needs me to live. My wonderful husband died in 2010 from complications from diabetes and heart problems. We had been married since I was 18 yrs old and he was 23 yrs. I miss him more than I can say. His cardiologist told me if my husband had bariatric surgery that he would have got his diabetes under control and he would be alive today. The cardiologist encouraged me to have the surgery, he said it would change my life, and it has. I still am far from my goal weight, but having lost over 120 pounds from my highest weight, I feel like a million bucks. Sure I still have bad knees and gall bladder problems, and also some female problems but that's ok.. I can now go to the doctor and not worry that I can't walk from the car to the doctor's office door. I'm not out of breath like I had been before I lost this weight. I don't need oxygen or my machine for sleep apnea anymore. I feel so much better, I just can't express the difference this has made in my life. The operation wasn't all that bad, not much pain and I would do it over in a heartbeat. The main thing I see is to be sure you have a surgeon who is very experienced and successful at robotic surgery. Check what your surgeon's mortality rate is. Go on the internet and check what other patients think about your surgeon and the hospital. Once you are sure you have the right surgeon and hospital, then put your trust in them and go for it. Don't listen to people who haven't lived our lives. It's easy for some nurse who doesn't live in your shoes to tell you what to do, but if she is threatening you that she will drop you as a client then she isn't a very good person anyway. She is a control freak. There are more nurses out there who need a job. If you want this surgery, then go for it, as you lose weight your health will improve and your mobility may improve also. Sending you positive thoughts and a big hug.

Cheyenne

 

[Cheyenne]

Hi, Everyone.
Went to Bariatrics Seminar at Cleveland Clinic on Thursday. I felt tired and well informed when I got home.
Yesterday I sat and read the book they gave us on the entire staff, the various surgeries, the five phases of food. and other things. After I read the book I called my nurse that comes to my home once a week and she was very, very negative about the surgery. Even talked about dropping me as a client. All she kept saying was, "Are you SURE this is what you want to do?". No happiness for me on losing weight.
Today I talked to an older female friend of mine who is so PRO-surgery that she can only tell me how wonderful it is and how no one that she knows who has had one moments trouble with or since surgery. She even put down this support group because it's not run by Cleveland Clinic.
Cleveland Clinic has a support group the second Tuesday of every month from 5:30 to 7. My problem is I don't have transportation to go. Plus I feel very comfortable with everyone I've met here so far.
Yes, I'm afraid of surgery but who isn't? I'm also hopeful of a new life after surgery. I know it's going to be hard but good things usually are hard to do.
I feel safer talking here than I do to anyone else in my world.
Oh, yes, Cleveland Clinic Bariatric and Metabolic Institute's doctors and center were awarded the Bariatric Surgery Center of Excellence and are part of the Bariatric Surgery Center Network. All surgeons have done 150+ bariatric surgeries to be hired by the clinic and do 100+ bariatric surgeries a year.
Please help me.

I just re-read your post. I was so upset what your nurse said to you about dropping you as a client that I missed the part about how good the Cleveland Clinic and their surgeons are. I read it but it just didn't sink into my brain. I think you have found the right place to go for your surgery. Good Luck!

 

[dancinbr]

Yes, Cheyenne she has found the right place.

Oh by the way the next time your nurse comes by: FIRE HER!

You don't need her and her rotten attitude. This will dramatically improve your overall health. Find positive support elsewhere. I don't know what your nurse is visiting for what reason, but seriously get another nurse. Focus on getting ready for a major transformation, all good, as you move toward your surgery.

Ralph

 

[TillieS]

Hi, Everyone.
Went to Bariatrics Seminar at Cleveland Clinic on Thursday. I felt tired and well informed when I got home.
Yesterday I sat and read the book they gave us on the entire staff, the various surgeries, the five phases of food. and other things. After I read the book I called my nurse that comes to my home once a week and she was very, very negative about the surgery. Even talked about dropping me as a client. All she kept saying was, "Are you SURE this is what you want to do?". No happiness for me on losing weight.
Today I talked to an older female friend of mine who is so PRO-surgery that she can only tell me how wonderful it is and how no one that she knows who has had one moments trouble with or since surgery. She even put down this support group because it's not run by Cleveland Clinic.
Cleveland Clinic has a support group the second Tuesday of every month from 5:30 to 7. My problem is I don't have transportation to go. Plus I feel very comfortable with everyone I've met here so far.
Yes, I'm afraid of surgery but who isn't? I'm also hopeful of a new life after surgery. I know it's going to be hard but good things usually are hard to do.
I feel safer talking here than I do to anyone else in my world.
Oh, yes, Cleveland Clinic Bariatric and Metabolic Institute's doctors and center were awarded the Bariatric Surgery Center of Excellence and are part of the Bariatric Surgery Center Network. All surgeons have done 150+ bariatric surgeries to be hired by the clinic and do 100+ bariatric surgeries a year.
Please help me.

JDuffy

First off congratulations on making the difficult choice of wanting wls to help improve your quality of life. This is a very big decision. The one person that you would think should be in your corner your nurse, and she reacts like that? listen to Ralph if she comes back FIRE HER!!! working in the health field she should be encouraging you. You need to think about what is best for your life. Good luck to you in your journey. Keep us posted.

TillieS

 

[Karenina]

It's very hard to process the opinions of others and sort them out. That's why I didn't tell too many people cause I figured they never walked in my shoes.
This is a good support group, but you need to get information from LOTS of sources, including face-to-face support groups and reading. Read everything you can. Ultimately you'll know what is right for you. And yes, this is not easy. It's a lot of work. But I know in my heart the only way to lose weight permanently is with bariatric surgery. Diets just don't work and for morbidly obese people, there's just no other place to go for relief.

 

[jduffy]

It's very hard to process the opinions of others and sort them out. That's why I didn't tell too many people cause I figured they never walked in my shoes.
This is a good support group, but you need to get information from LOTS of sources, including face-to-face support groups and reading. Read everything you can. Ultimately you'll know what is right for you. And yes, this is not easy. It's a lot of work. But I know in my heart the only way to lose weight permanently is with bariatric surgery. Diets just don't work and for morbidly obese people, there's just no other place to go for relief.

I understand what you are saying, Karenina. Wish I could go to a face-to-face group but that's out because of transportation issues.

 

[handsam]

I commend you on this tough choice. I took 2 years of battles with my doctors and others to have the surgery. I even fought with myself. Fortunately when I went to work for the state of VA the prison I work at had several people who had the surgery. Including my warden. He and others there were a big influence on my final decision. All of them had pros and cons to having it done. Not a one said though that they would not have done it. All said that their were alive now because they made that choice.

Surgery though is not a CURE for morbid obesity. It is however a TOOL!!! As with all tools, you need to learn how to use them. Just because you own a chisel doesn't mean you will be talented enough to make georgous wood carvings. With a good team of instructors though you can learn. The clevland clinic is one of the best. You have a great choice in them. As for your nurse, find out if there is a specific reason she is so against surgery. There are people who have it, don't get properly trained by ther team and have issues. I know one lady who had it and is still having issues. But I watch what she eats, and see what is in her pantry, no wonder. She is down a good bit of weight but she is still far from goal. I don't know that she will ever get to goal.

When you have surgery, and work with your team to reach your goal you will probably find that you don't actually need a nurse. No firing required. You need to do what you feel is right for you NO ONE ELSE!!!! It is a huge change, and a process you have to come to on your own. If you don't, you won't be vested in that change.

I am 5 years post op. I still struggle with all it takes to keep my weight udner control. Surgery is a tool. Choices are life. Choose what it is you want - to live???
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