fat-shaming
- Thread starter dianeseattle
- Start date
missyinacage
Member
Please keep in mind that all that loose skin that seems SO visible to you, might not even be noticed by others. I have loose skin on my thighs and knees, as well. I hate it and it makes me crazy. I just saw a family member who was like OMG! Look at how skinny your legs are!! And I was like yeah, but look at all this skin. Which she hadn't even noticed until I pointed it out. She said she did notice the belly jiggle (gotta love family .. keepin' it really real lmao) but the legs she could not tell until I pointed it out. And to be fair, she knows I had the surgery and was looking closely.
So bottom line, you're healthier and happier. And you're looking for, and AT, your flaws way harder than anyone else is.
So bottom line, you're healthier and happier. And you're looking for, and AT, your flaws way harder than anyone else is.
Joan1954
Member
Missy I cage:
Perhaps we are all dealing with the loose skin. However, like U pointed out,” we are healthier”. Now that we have the deflated body image we tend to be harder on ourselves. I am glad to hear and see People who realize that body shamming is not acceptable!
I'm fortunate to have a dark sense of humor. Growing up I was always super quiet and non-confrontational. Going through the changes in life I also changed my willingness to be more direct yet courteous with people. Someone wants to call me fat (rare) I just turn it into fuel by thinking they said, "You Can't" Nobody tells me what I can and cannot do. Of course, being a 6'7 power lifter with the neutral face of a potential serial killer has it's perks. I never got charged a second seat when flying and realistically they probably should have but I think the were too afraid to try and charge me. One time flying back from Tokyo to Denver I had a flight that as soon as I went to sit down in my isle seat. The little cocky guy in the middle seat was like, "Awe hell!" I sit down and I can sense the big eyeroll and exhale. I immediately turn and addressed, "I heard that and You're poker face sucks, are we going to have a problem here?" Guys eyes bug out and, "Oh no, no problem." End of problem. I've had great experiences on airlines with my size. Always remember the crab mentality of people. Those people are miserable and have to try and feel better about themselves by putting others down.
Qweensgambit
Member
I used to wear tank tops but I’m not crazy about how my arms look in them with the loose skin. It’s too bad because I have nice little muscles! But the loose skin detracts from that....
dianeseattle
Member
You know what I discovered about that? I'm the only person who cares. I look around and see nothing but normal people of all shapes and sizes. Try thinking about really important things that have nothing to do with your flawed self-image. There ain't no movie stars standing in line at the grocery store.
You are PERFECT!
You are PERFECT!
sharontx
Member
Dianne,
Would you mind sharing some of your positive affirmations with me? I've gone dark for a while because I am in a huge shame spiral, then my beloved poodle passed last Monday, he was 14. It was a rough week and his last night was a bit rough too but he passed at home on the couch with his mommy.
I am working on pulling myself out of the hole. I am finally one pound from my goal and I don't even really feel happy about it, but I do look cute in my new bikini (yassss I am 65 and I am gonna wear it!!!).
Thank you!
Sharon
dianeseattle
Member
Sharon, I look forward to reading your posts every day. That's an affirmation!
"Every post I make inspires others."
And I'm attaching a page of my affirmations, some of which apply only to me. Feel free to edit for yourself.
Love these. Very helpful! Thanks Diane ❤
missyinacage
Member
Sharon I am so sorry to hear about your poodle. The loss of a pet can be so difficult. Congrats on being one pound away from your goal AND your bikini. I am pretty confident but there is no way I am putting on a bikini lol
sharontx
Member
Thank you Missy! Well it is high waisted and I certainly don't look like a Kardashian, but I felt kinda "old lady" in my more covered up suit. I also haven't been out and about yet, but at least I am prepared. I strut around in the backyard (8ft privacy fence) and act like I own the place. My coworker cruises a lot and she says there are all kinds of kinds in two pieces and NOBODY CARES if they are a little thick.
Maybe all this body positivity stuff I read online is indoctrinating me.
Dianne, thank you for the affirmation, that certainly helps me get started. I am working on NOT ruminating. I am such a raging codependent.
However, one high point I HAVE NOT been stuffing my feelings with food. First time in my life. Proud of that at least.
JudyNY
Member
(((((((((Sharon)))))))) As I said in another thread, I am so sorry for your loss. I do want to congratulate you on getting so close to goal. And good for you wearing that bikini! You may not feel like celebrating those achievements right now, but you will.
Missy thank you SOOOOO much. Sometimes we all need to hear that we are our own worst critics. I think you are right, cause I know I look pretty hard in that mirror and see a lot of flaws still there. But the people around me are saying how nice I am looking. So this group is so excellent at being the best thing for just being that reminder at times not to be so hard on ourselves.