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I am here, here I start.

RedMama

RedMama

Member
-I am weak and I don't want anyone who knows me to find out.
-I can only talk to my husband about this.
-My best friend does not support me in my decision to get surgery.
-I dieted on and off over the past 10 years and so far I've lost 22 pounds.
-I understand I need help but my family life is not conducive to dieting, nor is my stress level.
-My health is a priority but it needs a major jolt and I believe surgery will do that for me.
-I have gained 100 pounds over the past 17 years and now I want it to go away.
-My mother makes horrible comments to me about my weight gain and my thin sisters only make it worse. I know I'm 40 years old but her words still hurt. :(
-I'm not afraid of surgery and fear seems to be the main reason holding most people back from getting weight loss surgery.
-I am at the very beginning of my journey. I meet with the coordinator in two days, after that a mini seminar with the doctor.
-I want this for so many reasons; have my health back, energy back, less pain, easier movement. You know, you are in/were at the same place I have been. We can all relate on one reason or more. I came here looking for support. These forums look very friendly and inviting. I think I'm going to stick around.

Thank you for letting me vent.
 
Congratulations on your courage. This is not an easy thing, but then, after it's over, you wondered why it seemed so hard.
The fact is, dieting doesn't work for the majority of morbidly obese people. Don't know why, but it doesn't. Maybe the mountain is too big. I personally think that not enough emphasis is put on maintaining the loss once you've achieved it.
Don't tell anyone if you don't feel comfortable. I told only the minimum number of people I had to before surgery. After surgery, I told myself that I would not lie--if someone asked me if I had weight loss surgery, I would say yes. But guess what, no one asked! It really doesn't matter how you got there.
My best friend doesn't support WLS surgery in general, and I will NEVER tell her.
You need to work on the statement "my family life is not conducive to dieting, nor is my stress level". Once you understand head hunger and stress eating, it shouldn't matter what your day or your surroundings are like. You are the most important person in the world, and nothing should interfere with your health and well being.
Please stay on the forum and contribute often.
 
RedMama said:
-I am weak and I don't want anyone who knows me to find out.
-I can only talk to my husband about this.
-My best friend does not support me in my decision to get surgery.
-I dieted on and off over the past 10 years and so far I've lost 22 pounds.
-I understand I need help but my family life is not conducive to dieting, nor is my stress level.
-My health is a priority but it needs a major jolt and I believe surgery will do that for me.
-I have gained 100 pounds over the past 17 years and now I want it to go away.
-My mother makes horrible comments to me about my weight gain and my thin sisters only make it worse. I know I'm 40 years old but her words still hurt. :(
-I'm not afraid of surgery and fear seems to be the main reason holding most people back from getting weight loss surgery.
-I am at the very beginning of my journey. I meet with the coordinator in two days, after that a mini seminar with the doctor.
-I want this for so many reasons; have my health back, energy back, less pain, easier movement. You know, you are in/were at the same place I have been. We can all relate on one reason or more. I came here looking for support. These forums look very friendly and inviting. I think I'm going to stick around.

Thank you for letting me vent.
Click to expand...


Hi RedMama! WELCOME to the Forum!!!

I struggled with the decision to have weight loss surgery for 10 yrs before my cardiologist talked me into having it done. I was afraid of surgery. Now I wish I would have had it done years ago. It was a very positive experience for me. I have lost 130 lbs since surgery almost 11 months ago plus 34 lbs lost in a few months while I was getting ready for my surgery. So I'm now 164 lbs down from my highest weight. The surgery wasn't very painful at all. My new tiny tummy is filled up very easily. I just stop eating when it's full so I don't stretch it out. Life is great. I have told everyone about my surgery. No one has given me a negative response except one nurse in the hospital who blamed my gallbladder problems on my losing so much weight. Well I'll trade my gallbladder for this weight loss anytime. I don't regret having my bypass and would do it over in a New York second!!! Weight loss surgery changed my life!

If you feel better keeping your surgery quiet then do so. It's no ones business but your own. Good luck on your journey!

Cheyenne :)
 
Hi RedMama. Welcome to this support site. Here you will find support, information, honesty, and advice. I count most everyone here as my cyber friends and some as family that's how much these people mean to me. I hope you too will find this to be true for you too. Best wishes for your success.
 
Thank you so much for your responses. It feels good to reach out my hand and find support here. I am doing all sorts of reading on these message boards. All this information is wonderful. Knowing I am on my way to a better life, I feel a large weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Thank you for being so warm and inviting. I am not able to share my new adventure with too many people and having these boards for support mean so much.
 
Btw, congratulations on all of your wonderful progress. You guys are all doing so well. I hope I am just as successful with my own WLS.
 
Hi Redmama,

Welcome to the forum. Congrats on your decision to start your weight loss journey. I had the same situation as you with the best friend not approving and not supporting your decision. I had to learn that I was doing this for me and for my health and not for her approval. To this day she does not speak to me and that is ok. I have learned to live with that and I do know that God puts people in your life for a season or a life time. She was in mine for a season. As long as you have your husbands support that's what counts. You can and will achieve your goals. Come back often there is always new and informative things on this site.

TillieS
 
You are very strong, stronger than you know. I wish you well on your journey.
I told no one but my husband also if someone asks i'll be truthful but I am not one to offer information that is not needed.
 
My appointment with the nurse coordinator is tomorrow morning. I am extremely excited. Going over my ins. I see all the criteria that I need to meet, which I do. I see what needs to be done by the time I have the surgery. It looks like September may be my month. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high but it really looks good for me. Can anyone tell me, what was your out of pocket expense when using your ins? I'm sure I'll find out all sorts of stuff tomorrow but I'm curious as to what it may cost me.
 
Cheyenne said:
Hi RedMama! WELCOME to the Forum!!!

I struggled with the decision to have weight loss surgery for 10 yrs before my cardiologist talked me into having it done. I was afraid of surgery. Now I wish I would have had it done years ago. It was a very positive experience for me. I have lost 130 lbs since surgery almost 11 months ago plus 34 lbs lost in a few months while I was getting ready for my surgery. So I'm now 164 lbs down from my highest weight. The surgery wasn't very painful at all. My new tiny tummy is filled up very easily. I just stop eating when it's full so I don't stretch it out. Life is great. I have told everyone about my surgery. No one has given me a negative response except one nurse in the hospital who blamed my gallbladder problems on my losing so much weight. Well I'll trade my gallbladder for this weight loss anytime. I don't regret having my bypass and would do it over in a New York second!!! Weight loss surgery changed my life!

If you feel better keeping your surgery quiet then do so. It's no ones business but your own. Good luck on your journey!

Cheyenne :)
Click to expand...

I will pile on here with Cheyenne.

So many of us struggled with this decision for a long time. My initial thinking goes beyond 10 years ago prior to the surgery advancing to the laproscopic and much safer procedure that exists today.

Fortunately, my wife is supportive. My sons are happy to see me at my new lower weight too. I told them all I had the surgery.

One of my sons said your starving yourself to death Dad. Well, no I am not. Yes I dropped a lot of weight (80 pounds to date now) but I am not starving to death.

With the surgery (gastric bypass and I also believe the sleeve) you are NOT hungry.

I am not at 210 and weight loss has slowed down to about 4 to 6 pounds a month.

I am eating small meals still. I still use protein drinks to assure my 80 grams of protein a day. I am enjoying more treats while I continue to lose.

Now, for the advertisement! Here are all the benefits I have attained as many have attained in this forum. I have kept track. Each time I find a new something that I no longer need or a new thing I can do now that I couldn't do prior to surgery I list it.

Here is my list. The benefits far out weight any risk. The risk/reward is huge today.

Medical/Physical Maladies that have been resolved to date

• Diabetes resolved – off all meds, avg reading 110
• BP normal again – I am still taking bystolic 5mg. Resting pulse is around 60 and BP near or below 120/80. Without the bystolic my resting pulse is still in the 60s. However, my BP goes up to the high 130s/high 80s.
• Sleep Apnea resolved – I am not snoring nor do I believe I am stopping breathing. I will confirm this later this year. The air pressure from the CPAP machine was making me very uncomfortable; lots of burping
• Legs no longer swollen
• Waist size has shrunk – Wearing size 44 pants comfortably and just made it into 42 pants.
• Feet are smaller – I was able to put a pair of dress shoes on that I haven’t been able to wear.
• I stay under 1200 calories a day. Most days around 1000 calories.
• I have a lot more energy
• I can dance, dance and dance
• I can walk up neighborhood hills aggressively without having to stop; no longer breathless.
• My incontinence due to my prostatectomy has been resolved.
• I am able to sleep in my bed again. I had been sleeping In an upright chair to be comfortable.
• Dramatically reduced backaches; almost completely gone.
• I can bend over and tie my shoes now!
• I can see my toes again 
• I can do dance steps again that I couldn’t do. The belly is gone!
• Now wearing size 42 slacks comfortably and looking forward to size 40 slacks. Just got into 40s but they are snug.
• Starting to sleep on my side again! This has happened in years!
• Intimacy much improved !!! 
• Fit in to a small diner booth !
• I can run up and down stairs several times without becoming breathless
• I squeeze out between two cars that were tightly parked together. A year ago I couldn’t get out of the car; I would be trapped.


Best wishes,

Ralph
 
RedMama said:
My appointment with the nurse coordinator is tomorrow morning. I am extremely excited. Going over my ins. I see all the criteria that I need to meet, which I do. I see what needs to be done by the time I have the surgery. It looks like September may be my month. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high but it really looks good for me. Can anyone tell me, what was your out of pocket expense when using your ins? I'm sure I'll find out all sorts of stuff tomorrow but I'm curious as to what it may cost me.
Click to expand...
All insurances are so different, but since I just calculated this figure, I'll pass it along to you. I paid slightly over $1800 out of pocket with Cigna Insurance.
 
I wouldn't ask this question of us on this site because it isn't relevant to you. You should call your insurance company. They will be able to give you real info that will be needed as you proceed.
 
Gr8k8 said:
I wouldn't ask this question of us on this site because it isn't relevant to you. You should call your insurance company. They will be able to give you real info that will be needed as you proceed.
Click to expand...

I believe my question is extremely relevant and I've all ready called my insurance company but thanks for chiming in!
 
I also had a HUGE change of heart and told my mom, my mother in law AND my best friend! I know, I couldn't believe it myself! :eek:
 
RedMama said:
I also had a HUGE change of heart and told my mom, my mother in law AND my best friend! I know, I couldn't believe it myself! :eek:
Click to expand...


Good for you, RedMama. I hope they all were very supportive of your decision. :)

As far as insurance, it depends on which insurance you have and how they cover your procedure. Mine covered everything except my copay of $40 each time I visit the surgeon, and $150 X 3 days maximum for the hospital stay.

Cheyenne
 
RedMama said:
I have Cigna as well. We'll just have to wait and see now..... :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

A rough estimate of out of pocket is about $1500 to $2000.

The biggest part of this is the typical hospital deductible you may have to pay for your in-patient visit.

I have medicare. The deductible was $1148 for the hospital visit.

Then I have a secondary so I end up paying 10% of all the other bills. So, that is how I came up with $1500 to $2000.

The operation paid for itself already since I am saving $$$ on not needing insulin, diabetic drugs and BP drugs.

Ralph
 
RedMama said:
My appointment with the nurse coordinator is tomorrow morning. I am extremely excited. Going over my ins. I see all the criteria that I need to meet, which I do. I see what needs to be done by the time I have the surgery. It looks like September may be my month. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high but it really looks good for me. Can anyone tell me, what was your out of pocket expense when using your ins? I'm sure I'll find out all sorts of stuff tomorrow but I'm curious as to what it may cost me.
Click to expand...

The out of pocket depends on your insurance, surgeon, anesthesiologist, additional testing based on pre-existing issues and as a preventative..

Your in the South East? I am assuming Florida and if so who is your surgeon and or what center?

My Out Of Pocket for the total from start to finish was $2500.00, this included my surgeons fees, heart cath, cardiac stress test, psych evaluation, hospital stay, nutritionist, exercise physiologist, anesthesiologist, labs and such.. My insurance covers all post operative surgical office visit co-pays for the first year after surgery... So right there I have saved close to 6oo.oo, cpap gear 300.00 and BP medications 100.00. So over all my surgery is paying for itself.
 
I will be going to :
Treasure Coast Bariatric
at Indian River Medical Center
Theodore G. Perry, M.D.
Vero Beach, Florida
 
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