Hi Cheryl, You have taken a good step by joining this support group. It is a wonderful group of non judgemental people with lots of support and help. I have not had my surgery as of yet. I will find out on November 9 when my date to have the gastric sleeve surgery. Please don't beat yourself up on past mistakes. Take the step forward and don't look back except improve and learn from past mistakes. I know I have been so hard on myself, but when it comes to helping others I am right there. Now...I am learning to be my own best friend and so far it is working great. I hope that you can teach me some of the tricks and I hope that I can help you in some way in our journey to a healthier lifestyle. Please take care of yourself and looking forward to sharing our ups and downs together.