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family changes

H

hmboucher64

Member
my family seems to pull away especially my husband as my surgery date gets closer 3days actually, he knew someone whos wife left him after she lost weight, no matter what i say i think he believes i will do the same. As for my parents and sister when i told my sister she rolled her eyes and has not mentioned it to me since. My parents are just afraid to lose me I explained that was the reason for doing this.. to live longer!! Thank god for my children and my best friends for supporting me!!
 
HAMBOUCHER64-You will find this forum a wonderful place to find support as well. Of course it can not replace your family and friends but it is truly an homogenous group of kind and caring people who are here to look out after each other. We will all be thinking about you on the big day!!!
 
My family is gone now but my boyfriends family tried to talk me out of the surgery every chance they got. His sister and 1 aunt were happy I was getting the surgery. My boyfriend is so pleased with my results he is in the process of getting the lap band. (Less time off work) We have gotten closer since now we talk about our weight problems. In the past we avoided the subject except when he was incouraging me on Weight Watchers. But we never talked when I would lose the weight only to gain it back. Just try to emphasize the positive aspects of the surgery and how the healthy eating habits you both develope after surgery is good for you both. Also remind him that you love him and maybe the other guy and his wife were on shakey ground before the surgery.
 
Dear hamboucher. My husband was very hesitant about my having the surgery. I just basically told him to get over it. I was doing it and he could deal with it. He is now very glad I went ahead with it and very supportive. Don't let other people get to you. Go for what you want. There is a time in our lives that we have to put ourselves first. We have been putting everyone else first until now. Good luck Mindy
 
Thanks Mindy, since my surgery he has been much better, i think he was afraid, but i did what i had to do for myself and i think he will realize that as time goes by thanks again
 
I agree 100% about putting ourselves first. Let's face it, this is our health we are talking about. I've been a widow for a long while and do not have any children so I haven't had to deal with anyone trying to run interference with my scheduled surgery. I do have a few nieces and a nephew who live close by and so far the nieces are glad I am planning the surgery. My nieces have been helping me out lately and one of them will be going to the hospital with me on the "big day". I haven't heard from my nephew so I don't know how he feels about it but even if he wasn't supportive it wouldn't sway me one way or the other. That's just the way I am about this sort of thing. You have to stand up and be strong for what you want and take whatever steps necessary to get yourself there.
 
I guess our families come to expect us to be a certain way and if we change we won't need them anymore. all of us fear rejection and boy have we had our share of that in our fat lives. as I write this You are amongst us please reach out. I don't always have an answer but I will definitely try to help
 
Hmboucher-Yes, I did get your PM, thanks. I had to laugh about the pizza incident. I would have been chasing her around the room in my wheelchair swinging my cane at her *LOL*
 
Patti, I am doing pretty good, I think. The only problem is that my blood sugar is going low too much and I don't know how to deal with this. Do you have any suggestions? Mindy
 
you need to eat something that will sustain your blood sugar. aet a piece of chhees,tbl spoon of peanut butter,or some form of protein. don't grab any junk food it will raise your blood sugar nut wom't last. carrywith you some of those little crackers with peanut butter. First you should reconize the sysmptoms of reactive hypoglycemia....shaky, hungry a little unsteadyn on your feet...get something in there now. hope this helps. It of course is best that after an episode a regular meal needs to be eaten hope this helps patti
 
okay husband has been great since surgery and loves the results!! New issue my daughter 19 is overweight and is happy for me but says" everything is easy for you now your smaller" she is not too happy i am smaller than she is so i cannot be happy outwardly about my body in front of her. I have offered to help her lose but will not even talk about it HELP!!!
 
hmboucher64 said:
okay husband has been great since surgery and loves the results!! New issue my daughter 19 is overweight and is happy for me but says" everything is easy for you now your smaller" she is not too happy i am smaller than she is so i cannot be happy outwardly about my body in front of her. I have offered to help her lose but will not even talk about it HELP!!!
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Why cant you be happy outwardly!? She needs to see how losing weight has made you happy and feel better. She is jealous, and should be :) Be proud of yourself and how far you have come!
 
Please don't tkethis the wrong way,she is 19 and not a child. the same information is available to her as it was to you. why should you have to hide your success. the surgery seems like a miracle but is a life long journey and you can't spend your time greiving over her saddness. you are not required to fall into her well of self pity. enjjoy your life. It is a gift that you worked for.good luck....she also knows who is the center of attention and it is her good luck..patti
 
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