Snapdragon
Member
Hi folks, I could really use some advice. I don’t have a surgery date but I’m hoping to be cleared for an RNY in the next few months. My problem is my oldest’s girlfriend, “A.” A has been sharing dinner with us every night for the last couple years. She is a child of divorce and her parents are disinterested in providing things like sit-down meals. She is now 19.
She has a bad relationship with food and her weight. She eats “too much” and then cries about it in private. I feel bad for her and strongly recommended that she see a therapist through the health center at her college. They would be familiar with young women with divorce and food issues. She is resistant. Talked to her mom, she is ambivalent. Her dad is now out of the picture having kicked her out at 18.
When I tried dieting earlier, my oldest begged me not to weigh food, count calories, or do anything that might trigger her. Obviously, once I’m cleared for surgery and start a pre-op diet, this won’t work. I’m already upset that they sabotaged my diet. I’m not backing down on this.
“A” is extremely sensitive and prone to crying and being “triggered” and feeling “unsafe” at the drop of a hat—in a way that even our liberal, bleeding hearts can neither stand nor take very seriously. However, my oldest does take it seriously.
Any ideas on how to announce/assert my WLS? I don’t want to antagonize her unnecessarily—she’s a pretty good kid for the most part, but the divorce and living with a cold, mean-spirited dad left her with no resilience as of yet.
She has a bad relationship with food and her weight. She eats “too much” and then cries about it in private. I feel bad for her and strongly recommended that she see a therapist through the health center at her college. They would be familiar with young women with divorce and food issues. She is resistant. Talked to her mom, she is ambivalent. Her dad is now out of the picture having kicked her out at 18.
When I tried dieting earlier, my oldest begged me not to weigh food, count calories, or do anything that might trigger her. Obviously, once I’m cleared for surgery and start a pre-op diet, this won’t work. I’m already upset that they sabotaged my diet. I’m not backing down on this.
“A” is extremely sensitive and prone to crying and being “triggered” and feeling “unsafe” at the drop of a hat—in a way that even our liberal, bleeding hearts can neither stand nor take very seriously. However, my oldest does take it seriously.
Any ideas on how to announce/assert my WLS? I don’t want to antagonize her unnecessarily—she’s a pretty good kid for the most part, but the divorce and living with a cold, mean-spirited dad left her with no resilience as of yet.