Grief for past life?

[sjameson1960]

good morning WildRose~ This is all appropriate emotions. You will adjust for the most part, did you get the physcological evaluation before surgery? This surgery is a 'tool' to help you loose and manage your weight. This is not the magic bullet & I know you know that. This is a Major change in lifestyle and it is like losing a freind that you relied upon all your life. You need to focus on the future, one minute, one hour, one day, one week, one month at a time. Get up and move your body and feel and accept the changes it is going through. You may need to talk to a professional, or better yet get to your support group which they usually have at the hospital you got your surgery. It is a weird time but remember it will be what you were wishing for. My advise is walk! Walk alot, it clears the mind, it helps the cravings, it helps heal =) chin up!

 

[Pat99]

Wildrose-Sorry to hear you are going through a rough patch. Nausea is common after this surgery and should pass in time. Ask your surgeon if you can start taking your meds whole or maybe just broken in half. I didn't have to crush mine as long as they were no bigger than the size of an M&M. I take prilosec, not nexium and I just open the capsule, sprinkle the contents on my tongue and swollow the tiny beads with a couple sips of a beverage. There is no taste unless I bite into a bead and then it's bitter. Maybe you can do this with your nexium.

Difficulty with eating or just not wanting to eat is also normal especially in the early stages. I was that way too but only for 5 or 6 weeks. I thought I would never enjoy food again and it made me feel bad. I am just now able to eat solid meats without stomach discomfort and my surgery was 3 1/2 months ago. I can eat mosit soft foods of any type except if they contain sugar or are high in fat and I am now enjoying every bite You should still discuss your concerns with your surgeon. I'm sure you will feel better but it's going to take time.

 

[Kim M]

I am only 18 days post op and still am not sure if I made the right decison in getting the surgery. That being said, what I grieve is the years of feeling like a failure, isolation, and being invisable despite my size. I just don't want to feel like this anymore. I want to be healthy and feel connected to life again. For me it is greiving the time lost, which I can never get back.

 

[Pat99]

I know what you mean Kim. Although my journey just began almost 4 months ago I feel like I wasted my life. I'm only saying this because I have started feeling better despite my physical disabilities. I probably should be thinking I'm entering a new chapter in my life but grieving seems to fit better. I don't mean this in a negative way either because things can only get better from here.

 

[TwoMas]

Hi Kim, Tom here. I know think I can relate to how you feel, it was very difficult for me after surgery for me, I kept second guessing my descision and felt depressed when I was sitting home recovering, feeling tired and the thought even went though my mind that it wasn't going to work for me and I would not lose weight like every one else had. I also had self esteem issues that I thought would just go away after the surgery and when I lost weight but I guess those were a little deeper than I thought too. However I did start to feel better as I lost weight and my BP/cholesterol went back to normal without meds and my general health improved and physically I felt better it took some bumps in the road until I could start to get a handle of the feelings of insicurity, feeling alone in a room full of people kind of thing, I tried to deal with all that on my own and that was a miserable falure so I did go see a councilor and she has been great in helping me deal with some of my problems. I still struggle with buying cloths but one of these days I know I will be able to look in the mirror and see the thin me that everyone else see. Hang in there Kim and if you have some local support groups you should go to some of them and we are also here for you to talk with and vent to, your not alone in this. Tom